In the Christmas spirit

Sorry folks, the burly, cheerful Santa couldn’t make it this year. With the rise in global warming, he’s really worried about his house at the north pole.


But don’t worry, folks. Santa’s recruited someone for the job this year (no, recession hasn’t hit the N Pole, yet) – he looked far and wide for the cutest face and the gladdest heart, and lo, he found Genelia D'Souza! Elf-sources also confirmed that Santa’s lent her his sleigh, the reindeers, and his cute red cap for the job. Excerpts from an interview with the new Santa:

Did the ol’ burly Santa ask you to deliver a message to the young and the not-so-young this Christmas?
Yeah! He actually said, ‘Go out and have a good time, and leave behind all your sorrows and worries.’ He also asked me to tell you all to have loads of fun and get together. He’d be really disappointed with me if I didn’t pass on this message.

And how useful will the flying sleigh prove on Christmas night, given the city’s traffic?
It’ll prove to be the most useful thing in the world. Last time, I missed my flight due to the traffic. (So, this Christmas midnight, if you spot something red, cute and flying low, you know it’s the new Santa on the job). With the responsibility he’s given me, I couldn’t have done it without the sleigh.

Can we get a peep into your goody bag?
I’ve got loads of love for everyone. I also bring the spirit of Christmas – of togetherness and unity. Santa knows that everyone is worried after the blasts, so she says that Christmas will bring a new beginning.

And how do we all get into the Christmas spirit?
Santa says, keep it going, and make it a better, greener and more beautiful Christmas. The spirit of an Indian never dies, and even after the terror blasts, we’re back on track. Every year, a bit of my remuneration goes towards a children’s cause, and that will happen this year too. Bringing a smile on someone's face is the best way to get into the spirit.

Are we allowed to party?
It’s important to have a good time. And this is such beautiful weather to party.

But we’re scared after the blasts.
Oh, but you shouldn’t be afraid. Let’s not restrict ourselves. If anything, we should all be vigilant and report suspicious objects and activity and not neglect it. Terror’s not going to last forever. Look, Mumbai’s already on a roll. People all over India stood up together this time, and that’s the best answer to terrorism.

We’re not being greedy, promise. But could we wish for the traffic to get better and corruption to go away?
Since I have the sleigh, I’ll definitely give a ride to people who’re in a hurry. As a citizen, you must vote for people who you think are the best and do your bit to fight corruption, such as not breaking a signal or paying a bribe to get away with it.